For all the ladies that are getting baby fever, have you put any thought into what you want your pregnancy and birth to look like? Do you know what sort of events happen during the course of the next 9 months? I was shocked at how little I actually knew about pregnancy and birth, other than your miserable with morning sickness for who knows how long, your uncomfortable MOST of the time (God forbid its August and your 9 months pregnant), you gain weight SO fast, and then a human being comes out of you. (For any guys reading this, you might want to skip the next sentence if you don’t care to read the details) I kid you not, I found out the year before I got pregnant with Kate that you deliver your placenta after your baby. WHAT?! My first thought was “I’d rather have twins if I have to push 2 things out of me.”
For all you expectant moms, what questions are you asking your doctor or midwife? Do you want to be prepared for what events take place or do you just want to go with the flow of what people tell you you should do? With my first pregnancy, Joel and I had no idea what to ask! I’m pretty sure our meeting with our midwife lasted about 10 minutes (Keep in mind we just drove an hour and forty-five minutes to just MEET with her to see if this is what we wanted to do). We asked how much it would cost, how often we would drive up there for our prenatal visits and what happens if something goes wrong. Those are all great questions, but we didn’t even know what to ask as far as their procedures were for what actually went on during the labor and delivery.
Back tracking for a minute… when I was getting to the age to where babies could be in my near future, I started to ask mothers around me what their experiences were like. Everyone’s was so different! I haven’t fully figured out if there is supposed to be a kept secret about the details of birth, because most of the time I got responses like “It was the worst pain ever”, “It was the best experience of my life”, “ONE AND DONE”, “Everything that could go wrong did”, etc… That’s fantastic, but why was it the worst pain ever? What made it the best experience of your life? It was that bad that you don’t even want to try again? What exactly can go wrong?? I think at some point during these questions, someone accidentally let the placenta detail slip. Whoops.
OK, so….. back to being pregnant and deciding to use a midwife. Let the researching begin! Internet is great…… if you want to hear every possible bad situation there is in childbirth. I, however, couldn’t focus on that, so I had to find other information that lined up with what kind of experience I HOPED to have. As I, cautiously, told people we would be using a midwife (you get some crazy looks when those words come out of our mouth), a few people suggested books, movies, etc. for me to get.
One of my coworkers gave me a book called “Guide to Childbirth” by Ina May Gaskin (She and her husband started The Farm in Tennessee). Every woman (and her husband) should read this book if you are pregnant! I actually starting reading it again tonight to get some statistics and eye opening statements to interest you in reading it yourself. I could not recommend this book enough. Its the only book I read during pregnancy, and when I finished I was fully confident and prepared to have a baby naturally!! I literally had NO fears. It was AMAZING. Joel didn’t read every page, but I informed him on things I felt like he needed to know and I think that was plenty for him. LOL. (We’ll talk about Joel and his thoughts of this whole situation later).
Another source of information was told to me by another coworker (I love my coworkers! They were so interested and supportive of my decision, I think…) and she suggested watching The Business of Being Born. It was on Netflix so I went home and watched it that night! It was AMAZING. Unfortunately, I tried to look it up tonight and it isn’t on Netflix anymore!! I didn’t look anywhere else, but it just crossed my mind that maybe it could be on Hulu, Amazon Prime, or any of those other sites? I will look soon and let you know if I find it. Birth is a beautiful thing, and this movie shows ALL the details of a birth.
Another friend of mine told me to watch Call the Midwife. Its on Netflix and I am pretty sure it is a series. I haven’t watched it yet….. mainly because it takes a lot for me to watch a movie set in older days, but every time someone(Joel) makes me watch old movies I always love them! So, I plan to watch it soon!
Whether you plan to give birth in a hospital or at home, being educated is SO important! I can not stress that enough. Surround yourself with positivity! LADIES, YOUR BODIES WERE MADE FOR THIS!
I will finish with a quote from Ina May Gaskin:
“The problem is that doctors today often assume that something mysterious and unidentified has gone wrong with labor or that the woman’s body is somehow “inadequate” – what I call the “woman’s body as a lemon” assumption. For a variety of reasons, a lot of women have also come to believe that nature made a serious mistake with their bodies… Most women need encouragement and companionship more than they need drugs. Remember this, for it is as true as true gets: Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body.
And that right there is why I’m blogging. To hopefully give you all encouragement to be confident in yourself!
**All of your positive feedback has given me so much excitement to share this with you and I can’t wait to share more! If you have any questions or topics that you want to know more information, let me know and I will gladly address them in later blogs!